Oreolympics

Welcome to the Oreolympics

My group of PCVs, Group 29 (or G29), was sworn in on July 1.  Or was it June 30?  Anyway, it was a couple weeks ago.

Yet here I am, still in Port Vila.  What happened?  Well, my site changed.  I'm no longer going to Tongariki.  Everything I've written about Tongariki is even more irrelevant than when I wrote it.  The volunteer assigned to Moso Island decided the Peace Corps wasn't for her, and I've been reassigned to that site.  Here it is on Google Maps. It couldn't me more different from Tongariki.  Well OK it could.  For example it could be in Honduras.  But unlike Tongariki, Moso Island is not nearly so remote, not nearly so difficult, nor is it mountainous.  I was looking forward to Tongariki, and I'm looking forward to Moso Island too.  I'm just getting a little tired of looking.

The site isn't quite ready yet, though I sure am.  A week is more than enough time in Port Vila, and two is excessive.  It is a destination for cruise ships.  All of the tourist destinations just aren't what you're looking for when you reside here.  However, Vila has a museum, a cultural center and a public library.  I've also thrown a frisbee around in a local park.

Vanuatu has three national languages: Bislama, English and French.

And, I believe in anticipation of the 2017 Pacific Games, many municipal improvement projects are underway in Port Vila. Rue de Paris Street/Lini Highway is being improved with new curb and gutter, and much of the waterfront is now a lovely place for a walk.

New bus stops and sidewalk will benefit pedestrians and traffic

Port Vila overlooking Mele Bay at sunset

The entertainment options are restaurants and bars, which gets both old and expensive quickly.  I'm scheduled to visit Moso on the 19th, and, assuming everything there is ready, I'll return for good shortly thereafter.  I can't wait!

In the meantime I've decided to review and compare the Oreo cookies and three Oreo knockoffs available in Port Vila: Fine Fare, Omeo, Oreos, and ToGo.  Of course milk was used in the process.

Before beginning I'd like to thank the Vanuatu Holiday Hotel for providing the lovely plants and environment pictured in this post.

Cascading flowers decorate the Vanuatu Holiday Hotel's naturally-shaded pergola 

To ensure fairness, the expiration dates of all cookies was checked.  The milk used was Dairy Star whole milk.  The milk may have expired back in April, but I really didn't understand what the label, pictured here, meant because it shows two dates.  Anyway, it was new, irradiated milk that had been refrigerated and was fine.

One label, two dates?

Here we go, in alphabetical order.

Fine Fare

Fine Fare, along with Oreos and ToGo, are packaged in a tube.  A typical price for a 250g package of Fine Fare is 120 vatu.

Serving Suggestion

Fine Fare cookies are difficult to separate cleanly

Fine Fare pattern/texture

The dunk test

Summary:

Fine Fare is the largest cookie reviewed, has the least crisp cookie, but also, by a wide margin, has the most frosting.  The cookie part is not soft; it is still crispy, just not as crispy as the others.  The less crisp cookie means they are more difficult to separate cleanly: there is a greater chance of breaking the cookie, and the frosting sticks to the cookie more than the others.  Fine Fare have the best milk absorption, and don't lose structural integrity even when submerged for several seconds.  Both the cookie and frosting taste good.  Fans of the frosting part would probably prefer Fine Fare.

Omeo

Omeo's packaging sports the deceptive "Omeo" name and an even more deceptive depiction of edge-to-edge frosting

Serving Suggestion

Omeo cookies come in 4-packs

In spite of the excessive packaging, Omeo cookies have the highest breakage rate

As seen here and in the previous photo, the quantity of frosting in omeos is laughably small

Omeo pattern/texture

Summary:

Omeos are a puzzling combination.  On the one hand, the cookie taste and texture is almost identical to an Oreo.  They clearly put a lot of effort into duplicating Oreo's cookie.  They don't try to be just another sandwich cookie (not that there's anything wrong with that!), they try to deceive consumers with the "Omeo" name.  Omeo also has the most and fanciest packaging, but in spite of that, far more Omeo cookies were broken.  But the frosting is their biggest miss.  Not only is it laughably small in quantity, it is kind of gross, with a slight chemical/sour taste.  They put all of their effort into the cookie and packaging; the frosting is an afterthought.  Omeos are the cookie of  choice for lovers of contradiction.  Buy these if you only want the cookie part, don't care if it is broken, and don't mind digging through excessive packaging to get to it.

Oreos

Oreos in Vanuatu are made in Indonesia and sold in tubes of about a dozen cookies.

Serving Suggestion

Oreos here split cleanly too

The frosting patty is so thin it can't maintain structural integrity under its own weight

Oreo pattern/texture

Summary:

Oreos sold in Vanuatu are made in Indonesia.  They may have less frosting than Oreos in America, they may even be a little smaller, but the latter is not available for comparison.  The cookie has the same distinctive very crisp, finely granular texture as Oreos in America, and the frosting tastes the same.  A reliable standby with their distinctive cookie taste and texture, Oreos are enjoyable split or as-manufactured, and soak up milk well, though they don't hold together in milk as well as Fine Fare.

ToGo

ToGo cookies were only available with chocolate frosting

Serving Suggestion

ToGo split almost too easily 

ToGo has the second most frosting, with great structural integrity

ToGo pattern/texture

Summary:

ToGo cookies aren't as common in Port Vila as Oreos or Fine Fare, and were only found with chocolate filling.  The cookie is crisp, though not as uber-crisp as Oreos.  The filling, while relatively plentiful has a distinctly fake/chemical taste.  They split apart without any effort.  In fact some simply fall apart.  ToGo dunk without issue.  At 70 vatu, they are the least expensive option, though not the best value (refer to table at end).  If you only have 70 vatu left to your name, then ToGo are probably for you; you've already been making bad decisions to get you down to your last 70 vatu, so why not continue the trend?

Side-by-Side Comparison

Left-Right: Largest to smallest. Omeo, Oreos and ToGo are almost exactly the same size

Frosting side-by-side. Oreos and ToGo (the right two) have similar amounts of frosting

Conclusion and Recommendation

After testing all of these cookies, I recommend none of them.  I felt pretty gross after eating so many of the things.  Some palate-cleansing milk between each brand was the best part of this.  Just buy the milk and have a tall, cold glass of that.  Nothing fake about it, it is delicious, refreshing, and actually good for you.

If you still have to have cookies, then get either the Fine Fare or Oreos.  Fine Fare is a good, quality sandwich cookie with generous frosting. But if you have to have an Oreo experience, there is no substitute in Port Vila for the real thing.  Would it kill either of them to sell their ant bait in a resealable bag though?  Omeos are just as much of a joke as their rip-off name would make you suspect.  There is no reason to buy ToGo.

The winner

	Fine Fare	Omeo	Oreos	ToGo
Typical Price (vatu)	120vt	110vt	90vt	70vt
Weight (grams)	250	240	137	128
Cookies/pkg	14	24	13	21
Cost/gram (lower is better)	.48	.46	.65	.54
Individual Cookie Size* (1=largest)	1	2	3	4
Individual Cookie Frosting quantity (1=most)	1	4	3	2